Hello! Well, what a week. I feel absolutely (favourite word of certain people at work) drained and exhausted. I had a week off last week. Was nice to have some much needed R and R. I made a few changes, and was raring to go. Then Monday came. And it went downhill from there.
Bail out now if you like.
V's dad is playing silly beggars again. Stopping paying. This puts me and V in limbo house-wise, coz without that money, I can't afford the rent. This is such a long story, and frankly very complicated and boring, that I won't go into it here, but basically the sod knows how to play the system, and blames me for "setting the CSA on him" in the first place. Funny how some people can almost get away with murder. I'm not joking, even if he did do a murder, it would be someone else's fault.
Then I got a letter from the legal part of the car insurance telling me they are taking the other side to court for my damages. Great. So, that still isn't sorted out, and I really need that money now.
I'm not going into anything else in this blog, suffice to say, I really need to sleep for a week, and wake up when all this has gone away.
I do want to say a big THANK YOU to the friends who have helped me through this pants week. Some are on fb, some on twitter, and some neither, but you should know who you are, and I appreciate your kind words, support, and for making me laugh, more than you think.xxx
So now I'm going to waffle on about something else. Part of this is inspired by a blog of my friend's that I read recently, and part of it is something I have pondered on for a while, but now is a good time to write it down, especially being the feminist that I am (lol). I hear many times people (especially women), being called "nutters", or "psychos", because of the way they have responded to a certain situation. Does anyone ever stop to think if the person really is unhinged, or has just simply had enough? Yes, there are definitely people out there whose behaviour is totally irrational and inappropriate, but there are equally people who have just reached the end of their emotional tether, and in a moment of turmoil, they lash out or do something out of character. They are not irrational, they are simply impetuous. But this one random occurrence earns them the label "psycho", or "unstable". Nice. I can think of a few people I've heard described in this way over the last year or so, and when I've thought about them, and what I know about them (or have been told about them), I've come to the conclusion that they are not really "nutters", they are just people who have not been able to make sense of, or come to terms with, the bad things in their life, however big or small, and have therefore been prone to behaviour that the rest of us might find a bit unusual or unsettling. Well, it's about time we cut these people a bit of slack. I put myself into the "impetuous" category. Sometimes I can't quite get my head round things and hit out. Does this make me a bad person or a mental case? I like to think not. The vast part of me is kind, caring, loving, generous, thoughtful, intelligent, interesting, enthusiastic, and generally a "good egg". But, I let things get on top of me from time to time, and I do something impetuous. In some people's eyes, that's what they remember, and that's the opinion they have of me. And that makes me sad. :-(
So, this weekend I'm closing my head to crap. I'm going to make myself a list of practical ways to sort things out, and I'm going to do them. I might be about to become poor and homeless, but I'm going to do it with a god-damn smile on my face.
Blog you soon.xxx
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